#19. Why I’m On Dating Apps

Hi.

I’m sure it’s no surprise to my readers that I am single af. Yes, I am a 23-year old panromantic heterosexual who is currently not dating anyone. Another non-surprise is that I use online dating apps.

Now I know what you’re thinking. Liza, why use online dating apps? Why not meet someone through the traditional route? Well…

  1. I work a 9-5 job in very small company, and that doesn’t really open opportunities to meet people. Not people who are around my age anyway.
  2. Even if I meet new people through projects and whatnot, I find it super weird to start anything in a work setting. I suppose you could wait until the project is over, but then that just becomes a weird waiting game, then you over think it, and it’s just not good news for anyone.
  3. I’m not really into the idea of meeting friends of friends. The idea that a friend could be telling things about me to a potential partner (and vice versa) creeps me out. And even if I thought it was fine, my friends have enough problems finding people for themselves. Whoops, is that shade thrown?
  4. If I’m out, I’m there to have fun with friends, not to meet new people. I guess the only semi-acceptable non-awkward place to meet new people would be at bars or clubs, but at the point, do you really see a ~potential future~ from someone you just met at a bar or club?
  5. Let’s get real, meet-cutes in the outside world just aren’t a real thing. Maybe just not for me at least.

So here I am, an on-and-off dating app user for the past 2 years.

First off, I’m not really on those apps to actively find anything legit. Heck, I don’t even really use the apps much now tbh. “That’s what they all say…“, nah, but furreal though. It gets pretty boring quick, and I guess it’s just something to pass time. If I see someone interesting, then great! If not, then that’s just kind of the norm. I wouldn’t even really call them “dating” apps, so much as “I-guess-I’ll-maybe-talk-to-someone-maybe-meet-them-eh-depends-on-how-bored-I-am” app.

I think most people still find it something to be ashamed/embarrassed about, but I think that it really doesn’t matter. I mean, honestly, in this day and age, who the fuck cares? We get our music online, we order our food online, we book our transportation online, most of us share so much of our life online, what’s one more thing?!

I wouldn’t say online dating is a sure-fire way to actually start dating someone, in a sense of starting an actual relationship. I’ve met up with maybe 16 guys over the course of 2 years, and look at me, ma! Still lonely as fuck.

Dating, in a sense of meeting people and going out on dates, is pretty fun in itself though. I like going out and getting to know them, their backstory, what they like. I usually even get a free movie out of it! Dont’ get me wrong, I always insist on paying for my half, but that comes off emasculating apparently.

Now if anything, I’d say don’t look go into online dating with the hopes of actually dating. Just go on it for fun, because that’s really how things should be, no? I don’t mean fun, like oooh sexytime~ fun, but just like, you know, fun.

Don’t expect anything serious. If anything, expect the worst, lessen the chances of disappointment. There’s a lot of people out there who probably aren’t in line with what you’re actually looking for. Unless you are just actually looking for oooh sexytime~, then good for you, a shit load of people are on there just for that.

There’s so much to get into when it comes to “Online Dating” that I’m planning to break it up into separate posts on different apps. Idea credits for this all goes to Elizabeth Boon. She’s been reviewing different dating apps and her stuff is pretty informative and entertaining, but our experiences on it are probably different considering she’s the attractive social media influencer type, and I’m, well, me.

All I can say for now is that just try it! I mean, what can go wrong? If it’s not your cup of tea, then just delete it. If it is, then you’ve just casted your net a tiny bit wider and you’ve got plenty-er more fish in the sea!

See, I told you I’m really good with metaphors.

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